I was tired. Yeah, when I was on the bus, we are finally entering our familiar surrounding neighbourhood in Tomoeda, I was expecting to get a nice hot long bubble bath, maybe cry during the bath, if there are tears left, then I will slip into nice warm clothes, put the AC in my room and then go to sleep. We do have school tomorrow.
Home at last! As I opened the door, which rarely happens, to be unlocked.
However, my plan was severely interrupted and postponed when I opened the door to my bedroom. Oh, please save me.
To find my brother-MY BROTHER on top of MY BROTHER’S BEST FRIEND, HALF NAKED, ON MY BED.
I screamed.
I closed the door.
Wait a minute, this is my room, I’ve had enough of interrupting make out sessions ever since I don’t know. It’s time to handle this situation my way.
I opened the door again.
“ TOUYA! What the hell are you doing, you idiot! You’re not suppose to continue even after I saw you two doing…IT!” I shouted.
So much for a nice hot warm bath and sleep afterwards.
“ Sorry Sakura. Touya I have to go now anyway.” Yukito panted revoltingly. He quickly put on his shirt and went out of the door.
This is so sick! Okay, I can stand to see my love Syaoran Li with another, I can stand to see my best friend making out in the forest, but I just saw my own brother making out, with his own gender!
Argh! I need a pill now.
As Touya was putting on his shirt back on, I would not let the subject drop.
“ Why?” I yelled. “ Why on my bed?”
“ My bed broke. Both of us had so much energy then.” Touya said sheepishly.
This is so weird. Because of love, my always so serious overprotective brother turned silly and childish. And right now, I am not in the mood even in my head to talk of love.
“ This is so…ugh…you ruined everything. Wash the sheets please. I am NOW taking a nice long hot bath, and I will sleep in Dad’s room tonight, on the floor or whatever. When I come back from school tomorrow, I want to see my bed clean, and free of salivas and any liquids as such.” I warned.
“ Okay, Sakura, calm down, I will.” Touya agreed for once, without any comments or arguments.
I opened my wardrobe, just randomly took a shirt and loose pants and headed to the bathroom.
Once I was inside the bath, everything that happened over the trip replayed in my head. I still could not believe it, I kissed him, and my heart was heartbroken to find him with another.
I shook him out of my thoughts, and decided that the bath would end there.
“ SAKURA, how are you?” Tomoyo greeted me too cheerfully.
“ Ur..I only saw you yesterday were in the bus together.” I said.
“ Sakura, my darling!” Mei Lin also greeted me in the same manner.
What is up with everybody today? I know I’m being way too emo, but excuse and forgive my behavior, my heart has just been shattered into a million pieces by a certain amber eyed who happens to be walking my way.
Fuck.
I turned around and quickly opened my locker. I will turn my back on him so I don’t have to see his face.
Let’s see emotion check today what am I feeling. REGRET. DEPRESSED. EMBARASSMENT. BROKEN HEARTED.
So positive and joyful I know.
The bell rang, I turned around, and obviously he had gone.
I went to class as fast as I could, dragging Tomoyo with me because she was too engrossed in her kissing sessions with Eriol that happens daily. Today was overtime.
“ Come on Tomoyo, you can do this later!” I said.
“ O..okay..bye Eriol..there’s more coming where it came from.” Tomoyo giggled.
When we were already in class, the teacher immediately started a lecture, as it was nearly the end of the school year, how we have to make some stupid crappy idiotic folder with all our best work in it.
I expected to see HIM next to Nicole but for some reason they are not sitting together I wonder why?
This is so gay. I am mad at myself. Fully fully regretting it now. I just now the last two weeks of school will go like two thousand years. And I will rot slowly.
A:N: FAST FORWARD TO THE NEXT WEEK.
Nothing new happened. I’m still so fucking depressed that even Mei Lin and Tomoyo gave up on cheering me up. Tomoyo must have told her the final resort that they can do.
To leave me alone.
Tomoyo calls it the “Sakura last resort therapy”, it always worked before.
Well I appreciate now that they are leaving alone yet never leaving by my side.
Those five school days had been so hard, avoiding Syaoran and trying to keep quiet and look like I don’t care even when we are near each other. But I just wanna stand on top of the table scream out helplessly to release all my tension.
Shit. Here he comes again with Eriol.
I pretended to drop my pen, so I could go down the canteen table and get it.
Oh my god he is sitting here in our table.
What am I gonna do?
I can’t stay under this table for long.
Okay, take a deep breath.
I took a long silent one, and got up and sat on the canteen benches.
I made sure I am not making eye contact with him although who can resist those fiery amber eyes.
“ So, Syaoran what’s up? You been quiet lately.” Mei Lin said something first, noticing tension of silence in the table.
I didn’t dare look. I’m guessing he shrugged.
“ Eriol hi darling.” Tomoyo said sweetly.
Suddenly Ryu and Yamazaki came and join us.
“ Hey Mei Lin, hey guys.” Ryu came and put his arms around Mei Lin.
“ My beautiful doll, come here.” Yamazaki said in a joking way.
Chiharu hit him on the head but still she didn’t pull away when he wrapped his arms around her.
It felt like it was timed or plan. Although it wasn’t,the mood has to be right when you feel like kissing someone right?
Today was a cool day, the sun was visible but it wasn’t hot today. Yes, perfect moment to kiss.
The three couples realized the moment and started to kiss right there.
I felt kind of left out.
Naoko is sick. Rika had to go somewhere to get something sorted with the teacher about her assignment.
It was just me.
And Syaoran.
I realized he was just opposite of me.
Both of us were on the opposite ends of the canteen table.
We stared at each other for what felt like hours.
I was falling inside his chocolate swirling amber whirlpool inside his eyes. For a moment I forgot everything. It felt like I was in a trance.
But I snapped out of it.
I stood up and left him there all alone with the three couples grossly making out in their own little world.
Why couldn’t I stop thinking about him? I was sure that the connection we almost had was cut off, I don’t think we’ll ever speak to each other again. I am the one who cares. He most probably doesn’t.
Let’s face it, the reality, I’m just a chameleon, I just watch others meet their own love. Or at least even if it wasn’t their true love, at least someone they like returns their feelings. My job, is just to be happy when my friends are happy, and stand by their side when they boyfriend makes them mad.
Maybe I should just masturbate? No I’m kidding.
I am now walking around the town, I felt like I hadn’t had one since I came back from Bahamas, so I went around town.
Then I noticed the sky was darkening, thunder rumbled.
In a flash the sky was darkening, gentle droplets of rain fell from the gray sky.
At first I thought it would be a nice gentle slightly windy drizzle.
But I was wrong.
Heavy rain came down a minute later.
I didn’t carry anything with me.
I had to find shelter.
Then I saw a hut, where people rest in the Penguin Park, which is where I rest, near the cherry blossom tree I always sit.
I ran and reached.
I wasn’t surprised to find it empty.
I sat down and shivered.
I looked at the rain falling, pretty hard. I might have to stay here for a while.
“ Sakura?” A voice called me.
I turned around.
Oh. My. God. I said it ten times in my head.
It’s Syaoran.
This is so not necessary. A month ago, I would have died to spend a moment alone to with Syaoran, but not now. He hates me for making a move on me.
“ Uh….hi?” I asked it like a question.
A thought ran through me that he was gonna shout at me for being so foolish for kissing him or interrupting him with Nicole.
“ Hey.” He said.
He sat to the corner, near me.
“ Funny running into you here.” He said.
“ I was walking. It rained. I came here.” I replied.
“ Me too.” He said.
Silence.
“Syaoran?” I murmured.
He was staring somewhere else, but when I whispered his name he turned to me.
“ I just want to say..” I started.
“ I AM SO SORRY.” I said loudly.
“ I mean, for like everything, interrupting you with Nicole, and I know how you feel, you must think I’m some kind of desperate freak, and like you’re going out with Nicole and then this freakish girl comes..and..and kisses you.” I babbled. I whispered the word kisses when I babbled it out.
“ Sakura.” He said.
But I wasn’t listening.
“ I mean, I feel very sorry for you, to be attacked like this. I mean you can hate me for the rest of your life, I would understand-” I kept going.
“ Sakura. Listen to me.” He said sharply.
“ That’s something I want to talk to you about. I’ve been trying to find the right moment to speak to you.” He interrupted me.
I opened my mouth.
But he started talking first.
“ I am not going out with Nicole.” He said.
“ But I saw you two-” I said.
“ Let me finish! You came at the wrong time. By that I mean, she came to my room. I was packing, she came, so I let her stay there. I didn’t know. I don’t really like Nicole because she’s friends with Anna. But I didn’t want to hold a grudge against Anna’s whole group, you know, because they didn’t do anything to me, except Anna.” He said, and paused to take a breath.
“ She was flirting obviously, trying to make conversation, but I was not in the mood, then she came near me, and took off her top. I was disgusted, how could she make herself so low? Anyway, she was trying to seduce me and I was trying to get her to fuck off without beating the shit out of her, she is a girl, then she pushed me on the bed, I was about to push her away and then you came in. That’s why you see my hands on her shoulder.” He finished.
“ So you’re not going out with her?’ I said.
“ Hell no.” He replied.
Good! I am glad, I hope me and Syaoran are still friends though. I know I’ll never get Syaoran more than a friend.
“ And I want to talk about something else Sakura.” He asked me more seriously.
“ Yeah….” I said uncertainly, the look in his eyes, I know what this is about.
“ Why did you kiss me?” He asked me.
“ Um….” I mumbled.
Tears unexpectedly came out while I was trying to find a suitable answer.
I can’t stand it anymore.
“ Because…I…I like you.” I said weakly.
It’s out. My love life is doomed forever.
“ Ever since you came.” I said.
His eyes were wide with surprise, but he didn’t say anything.
I wanted to run.
I noticed that he was really close to me. I guess our conversation was intense before then.
“ You do like me?” He asked.
I didn’t answer, because I was crying. I am so sissy and pathetic.
“ Sakura. I…” He was searching for words.
I knew it. He is searching for words to not disappoint me but reject me and say some shit like he still likes me but only as a friend and he’s going to apologize.
But I could not face rejection.
I was trying to stand up, then I’m gonna run home, rain or not.
Pillows and bed will be wet tonight.
He saw that I was gonna stand up.
And the next thing I was sure I was dreaming.
He grabbed me by the arms.
And.
Hugged me, trying to stop me from going. He made me sit down again.
“ Sakura…I..I like you too.” He said.
“ You’re lying, you’re feeling sorry for me now?” I protested.
“ I’ve always liked you, I wanted you first, I asked Anna, about you- because you don’t seem like you want anybody saying hi to you- to see if you date. But she told me that you’re not interested. She was really nice to me, I guess one thing led to another, and I found myself liking her as well although I still liked you, but she was nicer and open so I chose her. I thought you didn’t like me in the beginning not even as a friend. So I was acting like I don’t care.” He said.
His arms were on the seat. But he was still close to me.
“ This is unexpected I mean..” I started to burble on again, but I was interrupted, very big this time.
He grabbed me by my shoulders.
And pressed his lips to mine.
Did that just happened?
Now it’s me who was shocked.
“ I..I like you so much..” He breathed gently. More tears came from my eyes.
He wiped them with his hands.
I didn’t know what to do.
But he leaned in, I think he’s going to kiss me.
His arms were on my shoulders, never moved but just secured me as his lips covered mine again. I don’t know how to kiss okay. His lips are so soft and warm. I was sure I caught pneumonia in the hut and died. This is heaven.
I just moved my lips the opposite way of his it was really sloppy at first but soon I was sure it looked like the ones you see in movies. It was getting much more passionate. His arms moved to my waist holding me gently yet so protectively, I could feel his tongue begging for entrance so I opened my mouth wider, and we kept kissing. Our tongues danced together with the rhythm of the rain among us.
We stopped for breath. Oh my god, my first taste of the adult world.
“ Your lips taste so sweet.” He whispered.
I giggled.
“ So, what are we?” I asked.
“ Sakura, will you go out with me?” He asked me, oh my god I love him, he did not use one seductive tone in his voice, just his normal hopeful voice. Syaoran is so hot, and he doesn’t know it. I like it that way.
“ You’re sure about this?” I asked.
“ YES YES. ANSWER ALREADY WOMAN, BECAUSE WE DON”T HAVE MUCH TIME HERE WE ARE IN A HURRY.” He said.
What did he mean?
“ Um…yes.” I said. Casually but inside, I exploded like the stars came down from heaven.
“ Okay so what are we in a hurry for?” I asked.
He shook his hand, signaling that I’m clueless.
“ This.”
He put his lips on mine again.
But I didn’t make a smart comment this time, because I was too busy kissing the guy.
THE END
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